Lies!

[pieces o'nine]

^ checks out people's garages on Google Earth.

[Ravi Oli]

^ rents her garage out to a band of Ozark Mountain daredevils.

[pieces o'nine]

^ owns a banjo

[Ravi Oli]

^ regularly wins duels with her banjo.

[black bart]

^knows how many banjo players it takes to screw in a light bulb

[Ravi Oli]

^ can play honky-tonk like anything, saving it up for Friday night.

[pieces o'nine]

^ shoulda learned to play the guitar

[Ravi Oli]

^ knows when they get to Heaven anyone can play guitar

[black bart]

^wears Corduroy Gorblimey trousers and lives in a council flat.*


*Cor Blimey trousers were commonly worn by dustmen (as in the song) and coal merchants. They are tousers of corderoy (sometimes moleskin) - very baggy and are tied just below the knee with string or rope.

[DavidH]

^ has a giant gorblimey moustache.

[pieces o'nine]

^ Is jealous of ^^ fetching crocheted skull-warmer.

[Ravi Oli]

^s got to have kaya now.

[pieces o'nine]

^ has a first edition of Five Equations That Changed the World.

[DavidH]

^ wouldn't know an equation from the equator.

[black bart]

^likes to think about the equation: ^'s waistline = </> the equator