Pastafarian Wedding

[Cap'n Tedward]

I married 2 couples at Burningman 2011, both as a pastafarian monister. Note, these are legal marriages (though I did have to register under the ULC). Here's the first one, filmed at the Temple of Transitions on Thursday.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8vUT7Cv9MX0

[Roland Deschain]

Ok, so my PC was on the fritz, and I lost the post, or so I thought. Just take the one below, as that was far better anyway

[Roland Deschain]

What a great wedding there. That blessing/prayer had everyone laughing, which is just what you need at what can be a very stuffy, formal occasion. You were the best-dressed person there! I hope that you are touched by His Noodly Appendage and receive many more bookings. His public profile needs raising! By the way, were you left any of the holy meal at 6?

(What a bummer you have to register as a Unitarian just to be recognised legally as a minister. It's almost as is the US Federal/State legislature can't be bothered to fill in the extra paperwork to register any so-called 'new' religion - we know that the CFSM has been around for millennia - so as to stop just anyone being official. Or is it that they're just prejudiced against anything that isn't Christian? The b******s!)

[Cap'n Tedward]

Thank you, my robes were made by a witty little knitter who recently converted to His Plate. The pattern on the sillky red thing looks like strippers and sharks.

I've been registered with ULC for a while now. I got an honorary Doctorate there too (Metaphysics), so I could be called Dr. T. :)

It would be nice for the pastafarian ordination to work without the ULC, but that sounds like a whole lot of work...

[skyweir]

Really well done, Cap'n! A brilliant blend of gaiety and dignity, and a lovely way to start a marriage.

[Qwertyuiopasd]

(What a bummer you have to register as a Unitarian just to be recognised legally as a minister.

Unitarianism is different from the Universal Life Church. The ULC doesn't require a particular creed, anyway, so it's not like one is hiding their religion by being ordained by the ULC. [/nitpicky] That said, I agree with your main point, we should be recognized as the legitimate religion we are.

[jimm1909]

I married 2 couples at Burningman 2011, both as a pastafarian monister. Note, these are legal marriages (though I did have to register under the ULC). Here's the first one, filmed at the Temple of Transitions on Thursday. Weddings

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8vUT7Cv9MX0

Amazing! Makes me excited for my upcoming pastafarian wedding!

-Jim

[Roland Deschain]

Good luck with your wedding, jimm1909. Hope it all goes well for you.

[Cap'n Tedward]

Indeed. And take some footage to post...

[kitan]

I'm going to have a Pastafarian wedding on August 11! We already got a friend of ours ordained in the FSM (and the ULC, just in case).

This wedding is going to be awesome - we're getting married in Utah and my fiance's (very large) family is mostly devout Mormon, so I'm sure their reactions are going to be priceless :D

Does anyone have any tips for having a Pastafarian wedding? I'd love to hear them! :D We have some ideas already, and we're thinking of using your "Hail marinara, full of spice" prayer, Tedward (with permission, of course)...

[Auntie Blackbeard]

Oim glad Ye arsked deary ,
just be shore to dress up and talk loike pirates , play music from thee Johnny Depp pirate fillims , an argh a whole lot .

XOX , Auntie

[Cap'n Tedward]

We have some ideas already, and we're thinking of using your "Hail marinara, full of spice" prayer, Tedward (with permission, of course)...

whoa there... slow your roll, not mine, I stole that out The Official Pastafarian Prayer Book
http://loose-canon.fsm-consortium.com/page-53/

[kitan]

Thanks, Tedward, for letting me know about the Loose Canon! I'm a bit of a noob >.>

My fiance, Brandon, and I have most of our wedding planned out. We've gotten our friend who's performing the wedding ordained in the FSM and the Universal Life Church. The groomsmen, brideswenches, and my fiance and I will be wearing pirate swords. Our centerpieces are large boats folded from big road maps (you know, the kind you can never fold back correctly during a road trip) with masts that have Jolly Rogers on top. We'll fill them with gold coins, both chocolate and plastic. Our official tiered wedding cake is very small, so we ordered 4 large sheet cakes from Costco for the guests. One says "Congratulations Brandon & Tracie", one says "Arrrgh!", one says "Touched by his Noody Appendage", and one will say "Brandon & Tracie - August 11, 2012". Some of the family will be wearing pirate stuff (swords, hats, etc) and our officiant is looking for a pirate costume to rent :)

[Tigger_the_Wing]

That be soundin' aaaaarrrgggghhhsome, kitan!

Oi wishez Oi cud be tharrr. Butte Oi wud be needin' wun ov thee cakesse ter be gloo-tenne free, loike. Duz ye 'ave summe veggie-tarrrrrian nosh? Ore juste fish-'ed stoo?

[kitan]

Other than cake, we're having angel hair pasta with marinara sauce (we're afraid spaghetti might be too heavy a pasta, and we want people to stay and dance), a delicious cheesy potato casserole that they call "funeral potatoes" in Utah (since people cook them for funerals frequently here; we'll give them another name), salad, and water. Some of the water will have lemons floating in it, some will have limes, the rest will be plain. And then cake :)

Unfortunately there will be no grog, mead, rum, or any other form of alcohol...the wedding will be at a city park, and those things aren't allowed. Plus this wedding is in Utah and 90% of the guests wouldn't drink it anyway

We've pulled this entire wedding together for just under $5,000...if we had more money it would be much more ornate.

Here's what we have so far for the ceremony, we're still finalizing. We pulled this together from various places on the internet and such. The text in parentheses are directions and what my fiance and I will say:

(processional ends)

(to the couple) Are ye ready to walk the plank together and thereby engage in legal matrimony?

(yes)

Arrrrrgh, let us begin!

Dearly beloved Pirates, Wenches and fellow Pastafarians. We be gathered here today to marry this here wench to her pirate.

Let us pray.

Hail Marinara,
Full of Spice,
The Flying Spaghetti Monster is filled with thee.
Tasty art thou amongst sauces,
and blessed is the fruit
of thy jar, tomatoes
(although fools believe they are vegetables).
Holy Marinara,
Chief Amongst Toppings,
Save a plate for us now,
and at about 6 o’clock when dinner is served, if you would be so kind.
RAmen.

Any Scurvy dog who has a problem with this here union should be saying Yarr right about now. Otherwise shut your noodle hole so we can get on with this and get to the part where we get wasted on rum.

Now both of ye say yarr where it concerns you, understood.

Do ye wench take this here pirate to be ye lawfully wedded pirate. To be liking a lot through the good stuff and the bad stuff, to be caring for him in the healthy times and the sick times, to be loving him during the times of great booty and the times without, to be having fun together while away at sea and while in port, and to be upholding the word of the great noodly gospel?

(arrrrgh, I do)

And do ye pirate take this here wench to be your lawfully wedded wench. To be liking a lot through the good stuff and the bad stuff, to be caring for her in the healthy times and the sick times, to be loving her during the times of great booty and the times without, to be having fun together while away at sea and while in port, and to be upholding the word of the great noodly gospel?

(arrrrgh, I do)

Ye may now exchange the rings, which are shaped in the unending circle of his great noodly appendages.

And now, by the power vested in me by the Flying Spaghetti Monster and the State of Utah, I pronounce you husband and wife!

Ye may kiss the wench.

May I introduce ye all to the new Mr. and Mrs. _____!

(applause and such; recessional)