Corrupt a wish.

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Rev. Rowan Redbeard
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Postby Rev. Rowan Redbeard » Mon May 26, 2008 11:54 pm

Granted. You make out your will and body disposal plans, then are inexplicably hit by a meteorite, and your remains go back to Cape Cod.

I wish for a meteor-proof helmet.
—Captain the Reverend Lord C.S. Rowan, Lord of Glencoe, Minister of Pastafarianism, Gentleman Pirate

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beergirl47408
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Postby beergirl47408 » Tue May 27, 2008 12:05 am

granted. Your head is safe, but you are subsequently impaled by a meteor.

I wish for a pretty urn, at least.
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Rev. Rowan Redbeard
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Postby Rev. Rowan Redbeard » Tue May 27, 2008 12:07 am

Granted. In fact, it's so stunningly pretty that everyone who sees it fights to the death for the possession of it so that that they can flush your ashes down the toilet and use it themselves.

I wish for an in-brain video screen.
—Captain the Reverend Lord C.S. Rowan, Lord of Glencoe, Minister of Pastafarianism, Gentleman Pirate

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Hqrsie
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Postby Hqrsie » Tue May 27, 2008 1:22 am

granted. it only plays "Sex in the City"


I wish I never have to watch Sex in the City
If only it were all so simple! If only there were evil people somewhere committing evil deeds, an it were necessary only to separate them from the rest of us and destroy them. But the line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being. And who is willing to destroy a piece of his own heart?
--Alexander Solzhenitsyn
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Moral Minority
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Postby Moral Minority » Tue May 27, 2008 2:20 am

Granted. You watch Charmd instead, which is even worse.

I wish I had a job at a bookstore.
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Detective TurtleHolmes
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Postby Detective TurtleHolmes » Tue May 27, 2008 2:41 am

Granted. You get fired and I get the job.

I wish I could have any book I wished.
A flap of the wings yesterday means big changes tomorrow.
Let's work together to keep the present inevitable.

So yeah, I went and got a blog.
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Moral Minority
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Postby Moral Minority » Tue May 27, 2008 2:46 am

Granted. You wish for a phonebook.

I wish I had a towel on my head.
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Hqrsie
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Postby Hqrsie » Tue May 27, 2008 2:46 am

granted. you want Everybody Poops

i wish I didn't own a goddamn television or any of the other mindless crap I've accumulated over the years that prevents me from doing the productive, worthwhile hobbies I try to pursue.
If only it were all so simple! If only there were evil people somewhere committing evil deeds, an it were necessary only to separate them from the rest of us and destroy them. But the line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being. And who is willing to destroy a piece of his own heart?
--Alexander Solzhenitsyn
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Moral Minority
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Postby Moral Minority » Tue May 27, 2008 2:50 am

Granted. Now you can't watch House M.D.

Idiot.

I wish I knew where all the men drive.
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Hqrsie
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Postby Hqrsie » Tue May 27, 2008 3:00 am

Moral Minority wrote:Granted. Now you can't watch House M.D.

Idiot.

I wish I knew where all the men drive.


(Not really a TV fan. Just waste too much time with video games.)

Granted. However they don't pick up hitchhikers.


I wish that I sleep in as late as my day off allows me tomorrow.
If only it were all so simple! If only there were evil people somewhere committing evil deeds, an it were necessary only to separate them from the rest of us and destroy them. But the line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being. And who is willing to destroy a piece of his own heart?
--Alexander Solzhenitsyn
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Moral Minority
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Postby Moral Minority » Tue May 27, 2008 3:03 am

Granted. Your bed crashes in an earthquake and you die because you didn't have enough time to hide under a table.

I wish I could find a decent joint for metalheads.
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Hqrsie
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Postby Hqrsie » Tue May 27, 2008 3:04 am

Granted. You practice rolling them and all the metalheads think your joints are terrific.

I wish I had one right now.
If only it were all so simple! If only there were evil people somewhere committing evil deeds, an it were necessary only to separate them from the rest of us and destroy them. But the line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being. And who is willing to destroy a piece of his own heart?
--Alexander Solzhenitsyn
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Moral Minority
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Postby Moral Minority » Tue May 27, 2008 3:07 am

Granted. You smoke it and get a heart attack.

I wish I had a joint which has no side effects.
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Hqrsie
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Postby Hqrsie » Tue May 27, 2008 3:10 am

Granted. It's so awesome that you spend the rest of your days smoking pot and playing the same 3 chords on guitar because you're just so freakin' high to care.

wait. I'm not sure if that's corrupted or not. I guess not if you have cookies.

I wish I could have another cup of tea before I passed out.
If only it were all so simple! If only there were evil people somewhere committing evil deeds, an it were necessary only to separate them from the rest of us and destroy them. But the line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being. And who is willing to destroy a piece of his own heart?
--Alexander Solzhenitsyn
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Moral Minority
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Postby Moral Minority » Tue May 27, 2008 3:15 am

Granted. I secretly sparked it with cyanide, though.

I wish I were muscular, but not overly so.
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