Arrgh thank ye PON...I am reminded of that great Piratical git 'Thee Black Spot's horiginal words on thee subject:
Welcome one and all to this, the 157th Jim Lad Award Ceremony. Here, in the sumptuous surroundings of the Portsmouth Municipal Hall, the cream of Portsmouth's piratical society has gathered for a glittering night.
As I look around me, I am amazed by the wealth of piratical talent that is gathered here under one roof this evening. Over there, that wizened old chap gumming a fishhead - that must be Black Bart! And there - that shiny head could only belong to Walktheplank! Oh look - over there is a huge hairy man in a charming little pink number!
There are many categories for us to get through this evening, and plenty of acceptance speeches. And so, as Mayor Keith Liversausage takes to the stage to present the awards, we start this years JimLad awards!
Welll thee Black Spot may ave disapeered oer thee glistenin horizon (altho rumour has it he can still be found in thee most villainous hell hole o Portsmouth 'Ye Redde Cowwe'), but little else ave changed.
Thee categories be:
1. Best actor/actress in a salty tale
2. Most Long Winded Posting
3. Best Pirate insult
4. Most comely wench
5. Heaviest Pirate Accent
6. Most grog drunk in single evening
Before we decide on thee nominees mateys...cast yer un-patched eyes on thee glistening golden Jim Lad Award:
Good luck heveryone...mine's a barrel o bribes...er, rum.
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.