PlayBilge Magazine and Centrefolds

[DaveL]

YArrrrr!

Mr Flynn was one of Mdme Fifi's finest customers Oi hear!

[joshuaskingdom]

Oi, yes maddam flinn, picked up me wench thar!

[Detective TurtleHolmes]

AARGh, oi 'ears Mr. Errol Flynn be on quoite frenly tarms wit our ol' Madam.

[aaRghNAbled]

Aarrgh, pieces! Were Mr. Flynn trooly an umbell cabbin buoy on t' Mad Moggies Revenge?? Yew looky wench, yew. Has ye moar pitchers? Hoo taut dat beeyooteefull buoy 'ow to wealed a cutlass and soard? Wast yew? Wot else did yew enstruckt 'im in? Ooh, pleeeeeze dew tell. Ennie 'ope t'looer 'im back to Portsmith? Oi trooly doan beleeve Fifi e'er met thet adonis. She shoor ne'er men-shunned 'im t'me. Argh, we cud make 'im soo 'appy ear in Portsmith. E'd luv yer veranda!
Ooooooh! Bee still me 'aaarrght!

[pieces o'nine]

Whye, thankee aaRgh.

Ackshoely, oi must give a nod to Auntie Blackbeard, who "mentered" yung Errol beefour 'e signed on t'thee Mad Moggies Revenge. As oi hunnerstans hit, she "menter" 'ave 'im do awl koinds ov fings an then she "menter" tayke thee credit fer hit.

Oi o's 'er a det ov grattitood fer traynin 'im hup roight.

[Detective TurtleHolmes]

Oi be afraid, Miss Pieces, that yer pickachure o' Errol Flynn onlee put the uvver pirates orf. Ye've made 'em all run away, wench.

[aaRghNAbled]

Oi be afraid, Miss Pieces, that yer pickachure o' Errol Flynn onlee put the uvver pirates orf. Ye've made 'em all run away, wench.

Aye, ye blaggard. Awl ove 'em be orf doin push-ups all day.

[pieces o'nine]

Oi be afraid, Miss Pieces, that yer pickachure o' Errol Flynn onlee put the uvver pirates orf. Ye've made 'em all run away, wench.

Arrrgh. Yer awl weenies. Did enny ov ye here Gertie oar Griffin oar Tangie oar me oar aaRghNAbled oar Auntie Blackbeard oar Pirgella oar Brenda hydin an blubberin wen thee centrefold were ov a wench? No, ye did not. We kin hapreesheate yuman byooty wivout bein' hintimmidayted by hit.



May ye awl be touched by 'is noodly happendidge (an not get awl skwicky habout hit) wiv hinspearashun t'mayke yer own submiss shuns t' yer 'ard-werkin headitur, Capn DaveL.

Oi be lookin forwerd t'Septemmer...

[Detective TurtleHolmes]

Aargh, ye muss've read me script wrong. Oi 'ave absolutely nuffin' agains' ol' Flynnie, an' the luverly wenches ove this 'ere magazine, but oi finks that moustache o' his put the other blaggards off tharr rum.

[Elastoman]

'E's a foine lad, t' be sure. Speshuly wif th' "knoife n sail" bit - et's dramatic t' be sure. An' enny diskremenatin scallywag 'as t' admire 'is stoile. But ye kin be sure Oi'll not be chasin' enythin' wif a mustache loike thettun (apologees t' Auntie - she be a foine damsel indeed.)

~E.

[Auntie Blackbeard]

Errol Flynn! My dear, ye know whut nickname Errol 'ad in his youth? Big Errol!

Now, I dun believe that Errol be that big, so I thinks we need ta take a look down his pants, just ta check, eh Pieces me darrrlin?

[pieces o'nine]

Auntie! A lady nivvir tells. An a lady pyrate nivvir tells wivout gettin a fayre broibe fer the hinfermayshun. Nollij be power an theyre bain't no cents in givvin hit away, loike.

Besoides, iffin oi rememmers roight, *ye* were thee wun wot giv ol' Errol thet niknayme, back in thee daye...

Ackshoely, oi must give a nod to Auntie Blackbeard, who "mentered" yung Errol beefour 'e signed on t'thee Mad Moggies Revenge.

[Auntie Blackbeard]

Auntie! A lady nivvir tells. An a lady pyrate nivvir tells wivout gettin a fayre broibe fer the hinfermayshun. Nollij be power an theyre bain't no cents in givvin hit away, loike.

Besoides, iffin oi rememmers roight, *ye* were thee wun wot giv ol' Errol thet niknayme, back in thee daye...

Ackshoely, oi must give a nod to Auntie Blackbeard, who "mentered" yung Errol beefour 'e signed on t'thee Mad Moggies Revenge.

OOh, ye caught me out. Oi jus' wanted ta git anuvver look-see, see?



He be verry impreshiv.

[black bart]

Aaaarrgh...the full beardy look be in now mateys...that Errol Flynn be missin a few facial hairs fer duty on my ship.

[Detective TurtleHolmes]

Be that so? Well, oi'll 'afta git summun on mine, as it be 'ardly beardy. Oi'd do it meself, hexcept this transcommunicatarr ain't got photoshop.

Tharr's some fashin tips fer this mgazine's column.


AARGH, welcome back anyways, blaggard. Oi'll spot ye a rum later on, down at the pub. On ol' Tangie's tab, o' course, cuz she ain't 'ere to say uvverwoise!