Corrupt a wish.

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ET, the Extra Terrestrial
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby ET, the Extra Terrestrial » Fri May 15, 2009 7:19 pm

Granted. It starts breaking when you're in the middle of reading a really riveting comment about naked wenches, just before you scroll down to the pictures.

I wish my arm would just get better and stop bothering me.
"Mit der Dummheit kämpfen Götter selbst vergebens."
("Against stupidity, the gods themselves contend in vain.")
-- Friedrich Schiller (1759–1805)
Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.
-- Philip K Dick

What happens when all the renewable energy runs out?
-- Victoria Ayling

English isn't much of a language for swearing. When I studied Ancient Greek I was delighted to discover a single word - Rhaphanidosthai - which translates roughly as "Be thou thrust up the fundament with a radish for adultery."

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PKMKII
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby PKMKII » Sat May 16, 2009 10:37 am

Granted. You get drunk. Guess who gets to wake up in a pile of his own vomit?

I wish I had an extra 2-3 hours to sleep.
"How is it that hardly any major religion has looked at science and concluded, 'This is better than we thought! The Universe is much bigger than our prophets said, grander, more subtle, more elegant. God must be even greater than we dreamed'? Instead they say, 'No, no, no! My god is a little god, and I want him to stay that way.'" - Carl Sagan

"To doubt everything or to believe everything are two equally convenient solutions; both dispense with the necessity of reflection." - Henri Poincaré

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daftbeaker
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby daftbeaker » Sat May 16, 2009 12:20 pm

Granted. You set your clock back 3 hours, giving you the extra time you need.

I wish I could go and shout at the bastard next door.
Too old to give up but too young to rest - Pete Townshend

I would rather be a rising ape than a falling angel - Sir Terry Pratchett

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daftbeaker
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby daftbeaker » Sat May 16, 2009 5:27 pm

Granted. Unfortunately Bill Bailey also entered. You no longer won. Fortunately Lloyd Webber wasn't on telly.

I wish I wasn't hungry while all the food's downstairs.
Too old to give up but too young to rest - Pete Townshend

I would rather be a rising ape than a falling angel - Sir Terry Pratchett

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Sentinel
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Sentinel » Sun May 17, 2009 4:11 am

Granted; food is rotten and you have nothing.

I wish there were quiter vacuum cleaners.

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Ubi Dubius
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Ubi Dubius » Sun May 17, 2009 6:16 am

Granted: Your vacuum cleaner quits on you all the time.

I wish I had 7 for Diplomacy today instead of 5.
Davros, Attorney and Pieces of Law
Keeping up appearances is a very important activity in religion; in fact, maintaining tattered illusions is its main activity. - Richard Wade, on Friendlyatheist.com
We make an idol of our fear and call it God. -Ingmar Bergman, The Seventh Seal

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ubidubikid #1
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby ubidubikid #1 » Sun May 17, 2009 7:04 am

granted, neffyoo and his bilgie rat joins you.

I wish weekends were a day longer
"It's like a parfait of fail!" -ubidubikid #1

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TwistedSister
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby TwistedSister » Sun May 17, 2009 3:00 pm

Roy Hunter wrote:Granted. That makes the week a day shorter, your Dad doesn't make enough money in 4 days to keep you in the manner to which you are accustomed, so you spend your weekends working shovelling shit for pit-ponies.

I wish this thunderstorm would just arrive, or just go away, instead of hanging around threateningly all night. Make your damn mind up! (Sorry, I get cranky when it's about to start lightning and thunder.)

Granted. It arrived here last night and messed with the Direct TV. Hope you're happy now.
I wish tomorrow wasn't Monday.
* If evolution is just a theory, religion is just an opinion.
* You never know when I'll be watching.

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Nef Yoo BlackBeard
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Nef Yoo BlackBeard » Sun May 17, 2009 4:57 pm

Grantet. Tormorrer is the day after the mornen affter ther knight bee-four ther day affter termorrer. Eye dun now when thet is, thoe...

I coman ye bring mee eye's creme an peetzer an sech.
cabin boy fir hyer. jyint hat no hextra charj.

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S'presso
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby S'presso » Sun May 17, 2009 6:02 pm

Granted. you obtain an I-Scream, Young Peetzer and Sacks. Now what did you want those for?

I wish school involved a lot less work and a lot more everything else
Look! A new sig.
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ET, the Extra Terrestrial
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby ET, the Extra Terrestrial » Sun May 17, 2009 6:48 pm

Granted. You're now an amazing genius, so your schoolwork takes only minutes to complete and your timei s your own. Unfortunately, everyone else seems like a complete idiot, and you're bored out of your mind.

I wish I had lots more money.
"Mit der Dummheit kämpfen Götter selbst vergebens."
("Against stupidity, the gods themselves contend in vain.")
-- Friedrich Schiller (1759–1805)
Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.
-- Philip K Dick

What happens when all the renewable energy runs out?
-- Victoria Ayling

English isn't much of a language for swearing. When I studied Ancient Greek I was delighted to discover a single word - Rhaphanidosthai - which translates roughly as "Be thou thrust up the fundament with a radish for adultery."

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S'presso
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby S'presso » Sun May 17, 2009 7:03 pm

Granted, You have been chosen to receive $1000000 dollars from a distant relative living in Croatia. All you have to do is send your credit information, your full name, address and date of birth.

I wish I could tell the difference between allergies and colds.
Look! A new sig.
Blaaaaag.

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daftbeaker
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby daftbeaker » Mon May 18, 2009 10:46 am

Granted. It turns out you're allergic to colds.

I wish I didn't have to get up early tomorrow.
Too old to give up but too young to rest - Pete Townshend

I would rather be a rising ape than a falling angel - Sir Terry Pratchett

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Ubi Dubius
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Ubi Dubius » Mon May 18, 2009 11:30 am

Granted, 39 inches (1 meter) of snow buries your city in a surprise blizzard. Nothing moves. No need to get up.

I wish firms/agencies were in as big a hurry to hire me as I am to be hired.
Davros, Attorney and Pieces of Law
Keeping up appearances is a very important activity in religion; in fact, maintaining tattered illusions is its main activity. - Richard Wade, on Friendlyatheist.com
We make an idol of our fear and call it God. -Ingmar Bergman, The Seventh Seal

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Scott the Pirate
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Scott the Pirate » Mon May 18, 2009 2:19 pm

Granted, but you have 10 -hour meetings every day for the next six months. She's pissed.....

I wis that i'd remembered to order my salad with no tomatoes.
Roy Hunter wrote:Then, when you've got to know them a bit and their defences are down, you go all Scott the Pirate on them...
:lech:


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